Pregnancy-Related Loss

Your loss is deeply personal to you, both physically and emotionally, as is your grief. Such a loss is not only the loss of your child, but perhaps also your dreams, aspirations and expectations leading up to that point. 

Despite 1 in 5 pregnancies resulting in miscarriage, there can often be unanswered questions as to what actually went wrong after being told at your scan that everything was well. Now that the shock and confusion has subsided, it might feel as though you've just been left to pick up the pieces. 

 

Friends and family may not have been aware of your pregnancy yet, making it an even more isolating experience. Or if they were, you may be picking up an expectation from them that you should be able to come to terms with what happened and move on. Perhaps you've received what feel like empty reassurances, such as suggestions that "you can always try again" or "at least you already have children". This can feel dismissive of your journey and private and personal bond with your baby who was growing inside of you. 

Examples of pregnancy-related loss I work with are: 

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  • Infertility

  • IVF 

  • Miscarriage

  • Stillbirth

Following any form of pregnancy-related loss, you may be experiencing one or more of the following:

  • Intrusive thoughts and memories

  • Feelings of guilt 

  • Difficulty and maybe even avoidance of seeing others with their children

  • Feeling as though a potential life opportunity or road has been lost to you 

  • Tensions in your relationship following your loss

  • Difficulties grieving with your partner and not feeling 'supported'

  • An increased awareness of your 'body clock'

You see life carrying on around you but you may be not ready for life to carry on yet. You may need time to acknowledge, grieve and commemorate your loss. 

 

Some clients I have worked with have voiced a need to 'remember' their baby and mark their loss but may not feel entitled to do so or not know how. I work with clients to provide a space where they can process their loss in their own time, in a way that they need to and in a validating space.